I know I should be feeling joy. If only I understood

lelandrunning Posts: 1
edited June 2022 in Encouragement

If only I wasn’t so stupid when it comes to computers. Here I purchased some kind of wonderful information but I’m so lost I just want to cry and give up. I truly deserve to starve to death. I’m the worst gardener I know who wastes the most time with unsuccessful gardening. I was going to try to mane fertilize by putting plants and weeds in water buckets for a few months until it smells horrible and stinky but I’m glad I think I read something about that being anaerobic and therefore toxic… how the heck would anybody know??? I’m surprised I have lived 57 years!



  • Michelle D
    Michelle D Posts: 1,423 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @lelandrunning welcome to the forums. It sounds like you have a lot of frustration. There are many knowledgeable people here that would love to help. I suggest that you start by gather information. Some people learn best by doing but some gardening mistakes can take a lot of headache and heartache to correct.

    Read lots of articles and other discussions here on the forums, take some of the classes in the academy, and watching YouTube videos are a few places to start. It is also important to ask questions. Give us a bit of information about your situation so that we can give specific answers.

    Don't be so hard on yourself. Give yourself room to make mistakes because we all do.

  • Torey
    Torey Posts: 5,517 admin

    @lelandrunning Welcome to TGN's forum. I'm sorry you are finding gardening such a challenge.

    All of us here have experienced mistakes and losses at some point, as well as the bounty that our gardens provide for us. I hope you aren't totally discouraged.

    First, let us know where you are in our introductions section. That will be a big help in understanding your climate and gardening challenges. https://community.thegrownetwork.com/categories/introductions

    If you have specific questions you can start a discussion for them or use the search bar to look for other discussions. Someone may have already started a discussion on the topic you need assistance with. There is also the Blog. You can use the search bar to look for topics.

    @Michelle D has given good advice on taking courses in TGN's Academy. Great places to help you start gardening for food and/or medicine. There is also the Wildcrafting & Foraging course that will help you find food and medicine without gardening. And courses to help you preserve your harvest.

    STICK WITH IT! The rewards and benefits will out weigh any frustration you are feeling right now.

  • LaurieLovesLearning
    LaurieLovesLearning Posts: 7,375 admin
    edited June 2022

    @lelandrunning I have a growing garden this year and except that it's wet & grass & weeds will most likely take over before I can get into it (and possibly things will succumb to the saturated ground), I haven't always gotten this far.

    Many years ago, I had a very successful garden in another spot...but 2 years ago, you would have been hard pressed to find much in amongst the grass, clover, thistles & bindweed. It was a jungle. We got a few potatoes, but never got them all in and they froze. I was thoroughly embarrassed. I come from a long line of fantastic gardeners from an ethnic group that is known for its beautiful, lush & overly successful gardens. I have growing knowledge, worked at a greenhouse-nursery, grew up around gardening, yet here I was...with that. I didn't want to talk about gardens with anyone and it was very humiliating when anyone wanted to bring that up. Everybody wanted to talk gardens. It was the first thing out of their mouths. I dreaded that subject and needed excuses. I hated that and tried to always quickly redirect the conversation.

    I also had a few years where no garden was planted. In my circle, it was like you insulted someone if you said no garden this year. They seemed disgusted. There was nothing more to talk about. Let me tell you, it was hard because I was already beating myself up enough.

    Many people love gardening & even weeding. I love looking at a perfect or well designed garden. BUT, truth be told, I really hate weeding. I hate picking peas. It is always in the heat. I try new things and they often don't work for me like they do for others. On occasion they do though. I do kind of like some aspects of gardening, but it is not my passion...yet here I am, on TGN! Haha

    I garden because of my heritage...to honor it, because I have a large family, because the food tastes way better, I know how I grow it, & because food is expensive.

    I was not going to plant a garden last year & said its too dry, nothing will grow (except weeds), nobody helps me, my knees, back and wrists hurt, etc. I had lots of reasons and excuses. But, my kids all said that I HAD to plant a garden. That was strange for them to say after a disaster year.

    I am glad that I did. Last year wasn't great, and it was dry, but we had a garden (in a new location). This year, because they wanted to do it, it's been doubled.

    My message to you is to not give up. Keep trying.

    We can help encourage you and give you suggestions. But DON'T GIVE UP. Keep trying.

    On the subject of the computer thing...what did you buy? Can we walk you through it? Are you having trouble accessing the information? Tell us more. Let us help.

  • VermontCathy
    VermontCathy Posts: 1,920 ✭✭✭✭✭
    edited June 2022

    @lelandrunning Anaerobic composting is not toxic, just slow compared with aerobic breakdown.

    Making compost tea by dumping weeds, grass, etc. in a wet bucket and leaving it to rot does work.

  • Lisa K
    Lisa K Posts: 1,842 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @lelandrunning I have been gardening for years and I have had some success and some epic failures, what helps me keep going is I approach gardening as an experiment, enjoy the successes and chalk up the failures to a learning lesson.

  • matt251
    matt251 Posts: 3 ✭✭✭

    @lelandrunning please try not to get discouraged, even the most expert gardeners have failures along with many successes. May I suggest you try to reset or regroup by starting small scale first, with a couple of herbs that are easy to grow (dill grows quite easily as well as basil) and maybe 1 or 2 two vegetables that are easy for beginner gardeners (radishes, beans, beets, lettuce & swiss chard are good options for beginner gardeners). Then you can slowly scale up once you get into a good system that works for you. Also, document everything you do in a garden journal, including any issues, how you solved them, what worked and what didn't work. Mistakes & failures are great because you can learn from them and in turn learn what not to do when growing food. I promise you, with a little help, good information, asking a ton of questions and perserverance you will be an amazing gardener in no time!

  • jowitt.europe
    jowitt.europe Posts: 1,413 admin

    @lelandrunning welcome to the forum from me as well.

    the fertilizer with plants really works. May be one should put in the right plants. I use stinging nettle, comfrey and horsetail. The liquid stinks. Here some use some clay to neutralize the smell, I simply cover the container. And then dilute it a lot, before I water my plants with it.

    Learning from one’s own mistakes is the best way to learn, unless one gets too much frustrated. But you have a better way to learn as you have already joined the forum. There is so much knowledge here.

  • water2world
    water2world Posts: 1,091 ✭✭✭✭

    @lelandrunning Don't be so hard on yourself! I know how you feel, but using the suggestions given above will start you on the right track! It won't be long before you will chuckle at this chapter in becoming a succesful gardener!

  • Cornelius
    Cornelius Posts: 872 ✭✭✭✭

    @lelandrunning Welcome to the forum! I second everything else that has been said thus far. My personal failure has been killing mint (it is known for being nearly impossible to kill, but I still pulled it off lol). Mistakes happen, but you have the tools to fix them. If a plant dies then you have more seeds. If a weed is in the way then show it the door (to the compost lol). If you have any questions please do not hesitate to post them here in the forums.

  • Owl
    Owl Posts: 346 ✭✭✭

    Discouragement goes hand in hand with gardening, at least for me! 4 years ago I grew an incredible crop of tomatoes. The past 3 years, I’ve not managed to get more than a few Tommy toes to snack on. This year I have a decent crop in progress but nothing changed from one year to the next. I have severe memory issues so I have to relearn a lot every year, it has taught me to treat every endeavor in the garden as an experiment. Some are successful and some dismal failures but satisfying regardless because any day playing in the dirt is a good day!

  • Lisa K
    Lisa K Posts: 1,842 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @owl I couldn't agree more - a day playing in the dirt is definitely a good day!

  • Mark Baker
    Mark Baker Posts: 19

    So many things go into creating a successful garden. Some places are much easier to garden than others. I lived in Kentucky for a while. There, is was so easy that there was a joke that you could just throw down the seeds and then jump back, because they would grow so fast. Here in Texas, it is much, much harder. No rain for several weeks or months in the summer and 100 degrees day after day with dead clay soil with a PH of 8.5 makes it seem impossible at times. If I hadn't experienced gardening in Kentucky, I probably would have given up a long time ago. Hang in there and learn what works in your area.

  • vickeym
    vickeym Posts: 2,020 ✭✭✭✭✭

    @lelandrunning Please don't be so hard on yourself. There is always a learning curve and when you think you have it figured out nature will throw a new twist in so nothing will go right that year.

    As to the liquid fertilizer from weeds... Here is a link to a video from David The Good. He is a contributor here and has several videos, books and so on about gardening.

    We don't all have the same weeds, trees and plants available to us but we can still make it work using what we have. I'm in Alaska and we have extremely poor soil. Mostly clay and gravel in my area. Have never lived anywhere that I had to buy dirt before. It takes patience and a lot of work but even my soil can be turned into great garden soil with time and planning.

  • MissPatricia
    MissPatricia Posts: 318 ✭✭✭

    If we learn from our failures and mistakes, we are not stupid. Also, some failures are not within our control, such as drought, excess rain, illness, fatugue. I hope you keep trying as I have done for far longer.